But in his free time, Senator Orrin Hatch has penned a Hanukkah song, which is creatively titled “Eight Days of Hanukkah.” Hatch dreams of it being sung someday by Barbra Streisand. Something tells me he might have to settle for Joe Lieberman, but at least he didn’t attempt to sing it himself.

Hatch feels a close tie with Judaism, telling The Hill, “I feel sorry I’m not Jewish sometimes.”

Jon Stewart, your move.

Watch video of Orrin Hatch’s Hanukkah song below:

Eight Days of Hanukkah from Tablet Magazine on Vimeo.

Orrin Hatch’s Hanukkah Song: ‘Eight Days Of Hanukkah’ (VIDEO) [Huffington Post]
Sen. Orrin Hatch writes a Hannukah song [The Hill]

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On his cooking show on My Damn Channel, Coolio showed us how he cooks a turkey. NSFW, due to language and breast rubbing.

One of the secret ingredients: balsamic vinegar, which he also puts on yo mamma’s nipples, plus a “dimebag” of pepper. Pretty much as you’d expect. Martha Stewart, he ain’t.

The biggest surprise though is that he and his stoned friend were smart enough to go outside to do their deep-frying so they didn’t burn Coolio’s house down.

If anyone wants to try making Coolio’s deep-fried bird, have at it. Make sure you take his advice and stay safe. Happy Thanksgiving!

Video: Coolio Makes Deep-Fried Turkey [Serious Eats]

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If this video of the Muppets performing Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody” doesn’t put a smile on your face, then you have no soul. All of your favorite Muppets are there, with Animal stealing the show (as always).

This will be the best thing you will see on the Internet today. And yes, this includes any “adult” entertainment you might have watched. For research purposes, of course.

They sidestepped the issue of Muppets singing about killing people quite nicely. I don’t know if I could have dealt with Animal going on about putting a gun against someone’s head.

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Until just now, I had never heard of Justin Bieber. I imagine, if you have any taste in music, you’ve probably never heard of him either.

But thousands of teenage girls have heard of the 15-year-old Canadian singer and packed Roosevelt Field Mall in New York to see him.

After over 3,000 people showed up, the Mall canceled the appearance because they did not have enough security on hand. This point was then proved as the crowd got out of control and chaos ensued.

Several people were injured, and there were other reports of arrests after some people refused to leave. In the confusion, some kids were separated from their parents. One girl was even tasered.

The police arrested James A. Roppo, a senior vice president with Island Def Jam Records, claiming Roppo did not do enough to disperse the frenzied crowd.

Nassau Police say Roppo was arrested because he was not helping them disperse the crowd.

On his Twitter, Bieber said a line you would not normally expect to hear from a teenage pop sensation:

they are not allowing me to come into the mall. if you dont leave I and my fans will be arrested as the police just told us.

Dude’s gonna get some street cred now!

Teen singing sensation Justin Bieber sparks chaos at Roosevelt Field Mall on Long Island [WABC]

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New York Times columnist David Pogue has a 2nd passion: singing parodies of pop songs.

Britney Spears’ “Oops!.. I Did It Again” fell victim to Pogue’s creativity, which he remade into “Apps!…I Did It Again” during his Interop New York 2009 keynote address.

The lyrics to the iPhone app parody were inventive. The singing… well, let’s just say David shouldn’t quit his day job as chief technology columnist.

David Pogue Parodies Britney Spears With “Apps!…I Did It Again” [Gizmodo]

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Artist: Puddle of Mudd

Song: Spaceship

Explanation: Let’s face it, you had no idea Puddle of Mudd, aka Puddle of Shite, even still existed. But they do. And they’re recording new music. It still sucks.

Sample lyrics:

A long time ago in a galaxy far a wasted
I’m basted c’mon yeah
I’m in the floor and I got all
The flavors you tasted
With sweat dripping down your little back

Cause all night long, said
All night long, I been thinking
About how to get your clothes on the floor
All night long, said
All night long, I been drinking
About how to get your panties on the floor

If they spent more than 30 seconds on these lyrics, I’d be shocked.

Why this video is bad:

Douchebags in sunglasses
Star Wars text
Unnecessarily shirtless dude
It’s called “Spaceship” and they’re in space, get it?
The ending (I’m not spoiling it, you have to watch the whole thing. Sorry!)
It uses Puddle of Mudd music

HT: [Videogum]

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If you thought that everyone in Ireland was in love with U2, you are quite wrong. Following their summer gigs at Dublin’s Croke Park, their concert promoter has been fined €36,000 after the band exceeded maximum sound levels.

Bands playing at the venue are not supposed to rock more than a 75 decibel noise level, but U2 were louder on 12 occasions during their three July 360 degree tour concerts.

Despite the fine, local residents are not happy.

“It is a paltry penalty, it really isn’t a disincentive. They would write that off in terms of planning for such things,” Pat Gates, chair of the Croke Park Area Residents’ Alliance, said.

Considering the band made €19.4m for these 3 shows, Gates has a very good point. Bono might care about starving children, but what about the people who live near his shows? The neighbors were also upset with their roads being used by trucks while the stage was being set up.

U2 are not the first band to get in trouble for playing too loud. Local residents also yelled for the music to be turned down following concerts by Bruce Springsteen and Boyzone.

Yes, Boyzone. Even boy bands can turn it up to 11, it seems.

U2 fined a ‘paltry’ €36,000 for breaking noise rule [Independent.ie]
U2 fined for breaking noise regulations at 360° Dublin gigs [NME]

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If you’re reading this, you’re either incredibly lost or incredibly bored.

For those not familiar, I write a little sports blog called Sports Rubbish. For the past year, I’ve brought the world weird and hilarious stories about athletes screwing up. And videos of people getting hit in the groin. Lots of videos of people getting hit in the groin.

But lets face it, there’s a whole world beyond sports, and for that reason, I introduce to you Music Rubbish.

Just like Sports Rubbish, Music Rubbish will feature an eclectic mix of utter crap. Strange music news? Check. Bad covers? Check. Hilarious music videos? Check. Musicians getting arrested? Of course.

Along the way, I’ll mix in some stuff that doesn’t suck, just to keep you on your toes. So sit back, put your headphones on, and let’s get this started.

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